The bathing suit must never win

Shopping for a new bathing suit yesterday was its usual humbling and exhausting experience. Let me explain....bright fluorescent lights and a 3 way mirror in a coffin sized, non air conditioned cubby, began my afternoon of pain. Living in a summer resort area provides a plethora of brightly colored suits mostly thong bikinis, all tooting bare midriffs both areas in my no fly zones of public apparel. Bold advertising over the one piece suits for curvy women....read plus size, promised to eliminate my belly, elongate the look of my leg, enlarge (have you lost your frigging mind) or reduce my bust,and cover any side and back fat. Really makes you wish you had donned a disguise before you gathered together an assortment of the weiner-casing-like contenders for the athletically built woman (read same width of bust, waist and hip),in appealing camouflaging (slimming) shades of black, brown and Navy and dashed for the dressing room.92 minutes later, bathed in sweat from frustration and fulfilling my aerobic exercise componant for the day, I returned home to a welcoming 4 Robaxicet and a litre of Mikes' Hard Lemonade and reflected on the remaining 62 days of 36 C temps in the desert of western Canada. Maybe I am not meant to swim in the cool Crystal clear, though now chemically polluted waters of Lake Okanagan and perhaps I should take my daily allotment of vitamin D in Pill form rather than try to tan in the smoke filled air that encases the valley or maybe I should just wax philosophical and get a life and hold my own party....thats the way I roll....positive thinker...me....